The Kitchen Table
Would you like to react to this message? Create an account in a few clicks or log in to continue.

Bollocks

2 posters

Go down

Bollocks Empty Bollocks

Post by Yorkshire pudding Fri Jan 02, 2009 3:09 am

We had our appointment at the Clarendon Wing of Leeds General to see Professor Balen on Tuesday. He was the guy my GP had corresponded with regarding the possibility of carrying out insemination and hopefully some NHS funding for it on the basis that the funding was there for me to have IVF as long as we pay all the surrogate costs - so could it be used in this way instead.

I expected him to be similar to the consultants I have seen in Newcastle but nothing could have been further from the truth. He called me and Stan in first. He had already been provided with a full summary of my history and after clarifying the details asked about my general health, the meds I take and my weight. And then he seemed to be asking why I didn't want to go through IVF and giving the impression that I was only doing things this way because I was too lazy to lose the weight. I explained that after the issue with the cancer as well, I just couldn't do it any more because I had been through too much already. There wasn't a glimmer of emotion from him.

He summarized by saying, so you are looking to have ivf with a surrogate, to which I explained that we didn't want ivf, we just wanted insemination. He explained that all donor sperm must be frozen for 6 months by law so using thawed sperm our chances of success without ivf would be much lower. I wasn't aware of this and so that was a huge blow. He asked if we still want to proceed if funding wasn't available, advising that the cost would be £5500 and we could only say yes in principal because we hadn't talked this over before. He said that he would need to know first because there was no point proceeding if we weren't going to go ahead with it. He then advised that they would carry out a sperm test for stan and that he would see my neice on her own next, so she went in with her husband.

I had my notepad and pen ready to make notes but there was no new information at all so I was going to ask questions when we went back in to see him all together. We waited outside and then my neice and her husband came out and that was it - he had called in his next patient.

We had travelled all that way and had an overnight stay really for nothing. There was no new information and from what we could read between the lines he didn't seem convinced that there would be any funding for us - he'd said that he would be writing to my PCT. My neice had been given an envelope for a blood test and when I asked how they found him, my nephew said that they felt he was very clinical - just how I would describe him too! It got us both wondering that if we do have to go private for this, we would rather not have any dealings with him and so then who would we use or where do we go?

We had just started to get used to the idea of things starting in perhaps a few months, but now we have a 1-month wait until the sperm test, then once all the results are back in, even if we can proceed, there will be a 6-month wait for the sperm seperation, then Stan will have to have tests to rule out any diseases like hiv or hepatitus before we start the whole ivf journey. The irony of it all is that we have both had these tests before and since it's 9 months since we had sex, his sperm has been 'seperated' for much longer already!!!

It has just been a set-back because we both feel like we're getting older and there's now no chance of me being a mother this way until I'm at least 41. To top it all, we really wanted to have 2 children. My Neice wasn't really happy about going down the turkey baster route so now we are in limbo until we know what our options are (again). After 8 years and 8 months I had really hoped that this would all be sorted long before now. I really wish we knew which way to turn for the best.

Happy New Year - bah

Why can't anything be straightforward?

Yorkshire pudding
Newbie
Newbie

Number of posts : 32
Age : 54
Registration date : 2008-12-12

Back to top Go down

Bollocks Empty Re: Bollocks

Post by lazergun Fri Jan 02, 2009 1:54 pm

Sad i really dunno what to say hun Bollocks Th_hug10
lazergun
lazergun
Admin
Admin

Number of posts : 348
Age : 39
Location : The Land of Nod zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Registration date : 2008-10-21

Back to top Go down

Back to top


 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum